“One thing have I desired of the Lord, that I will seek after: even that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to behold the fair beauty of the Lord, and to enquire in his temple.”
(This cartoon is by Dave Walker, just like the last one. We have to tell you again, otherwise he gets stroppy and stamps his feet.)
The Vicar got up unfeasibly early this morning and slunk off to say Mass without giving us any breakfast. She came back all shivery and sneezy, which we think must be either:
(a) God’s judgement on her for having disturbed our morning snooze;
(b) because she really is allergic to domesticity.
You see, we had a bit of a visitation from some Parishioners last night in their ongoing campaign to make the Vicarage fit for feline habitation. Not that the place needs decorating or anything, but when friends start phoning from Italy to ask if we’ve got any curtains yet, you know things are getting serious.
After a quick check of the woodshed and privy, courtesy of the Churchwarden, everyone started moving the unpacked boxes and piles of stuff out of the dining room and into the living room. (We seem to remember that a while back, everyone moved them from the living room into the dining room, but no doubt they know what they’re doing.) Then we all had another cup of tea, courtesy of the Head Server, and settled down with the colour charts in yet another attempt to make the Vicar choose some paint. There was quite a lot of pathetic groaning from behind the dog-collar, until the Webmeister finally lost patience and decided to graffiti the walls instead.
What fun! He started to paint little coloured squares all over the walls, and we helped by examining his handiwork closely with our noses up to the wall. Soon we were helping him to put little spots of paint all over his hands, glasses and shoes too.
After we’d finished, the Webmeister went to wash his hands, but he was obviously a bit worried about finding his way through all the piles of stuff in the living room, as he decided to make a little trail of painted footmarks across the floor. We thought this was an excellent idea, and wanted to join in with our paws too. But no sooner had we started than the Cellarer arrived with a damp cloth and started wiping the marks up. That was a good game too. He was ever so pleased when we tried to steady his hand with our claws and keep him on task with a few gentle headbutts.
As it turns out, there was a reason for all this jolly activity. With the dining room clear of all the Vicar’s mess, there is plenty of room for the new table and sideboard, which arrived this afternoon. After the delivery men had gone, we popped down and checked it all out. We are pleased to announce that both pieces of furniture meet our standards, and we have therefore decided to let the Vicar keep them.